Chapter LI – My 9th Transfer // 第五十一篇 – 第九個搬家期

Friday, June 27, 2014

Sometimes, a mission can be discouraging. I think the last couple weeks, I have felt really down and emotionally exhausted. I guess that’s the best way to describe it. We meet people who are only here to argue with us, our progressing investigators suddenly drop us, and when you’re in an all girls mission, it’s easy to compare yourself to others. I just had my first transfer conference since coming back from outbound and I forgot how easy it is to feel inadequate and think how much better another sister is than you. I constantly want to be better at everything I do as a missionary, but sometimes I feel like it’s never enough. But I know that this is not something I should focus on. I need to just trust in Heavenly Father’s timing and plan and continue to work my hardest. I don’t know what Heavenly Father has in store for me and I need to just exercise my faith in Him. Before I came back here, my outbound mission president invited me to read my patriarchal blessing and make a list of things that “I Am,” “I Will” and “I Won’t” from reading it. I’m still in the process of doing that, but I think it has really helped me learn to understand who I am, a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father. I think at times, I question whether or not He really does love me or if He is aware of me. But I need to remember that all trials are for my benefit and for my learning. They are to make me stronger and to help my strengthen my testimony.

We had our transfer conference this past week and nothing has changed. I am still with Sister Hadzik and we do not have any new assignments. Here’s a crazy thing though – my trainer, Sister Cheng, and my MTC companion, Sister Sherratt are COMPANIONS. I never thought this would happen! This is also Sister Cheng’s last transfer. She is going home one transfer early to take care of her visa and to finish up her last semester at BYU Hawaii. I can’t believe my mom is leaving already! The time has gone by way too fast. I don’t even want to think about the end of this transfer yet. Every time I remember that she is leaving soon, I just wonder how in the world I will survive without her! She is constantly looking out for me and she is so inspired. She always says exactly what I need to hear at the time! I am just so grateful for some of the wonderful companions that I’ve had so far. Check out what my last outbound companion, Sister Wade, wrote me this last week. She knows exactly what I needed to hear! It was what I needed for that extra boost of encouragement.

“[Joseph Smith] faced a TON of persecution, like ultimate persecution and it made him who he was. It made his testimony so much stronger with every time that it was put to the test and I know that that is how it is for you! Just imagine ever single time you face [someone] you are getting to show the Lord exactly how much the gospel and His Atonement mean to you, not just by taking it, but just like the Prophet, giving Christlike patience and love in return. Sister Ying you are literally one of the TOUGHEST people that I know! You are there because God knows you can handle it. He knows that no matter how many [people] you face that you will stay true to Him, and it will not shake your faith or your love for the work. He gives his toughest battles to his toughest warriors. And you, Sister Ying, are one of the those valiant daughters that He knows that He can trust to take this on.”

Isn’t she so great?! I was so lucky to spend 5 weeks with her. Anyways, my time is up and I must go. But I love and miss you all!

Love,
Sister Olivia Ying

Mission family

Mission family

2014年 6月 27日,星期五

我覺得有時候在傳教時,會很容易感到灰心。我最近的幾個禮拜感覺到比較泄氣。我們在這邊會遇到許多要跟我們辯論的人,我們在進步中的慕道友就突然不見了,而且你若是在一個全部都是姐妹的傳道部,就很容易跟別人比較。我剛剛過我從賓州回來這裡之後的第一個搬家大會,所以我這幾天又發現到這個聖殿廣場的傳道部有時會讓我覺得自己不夠好,並且我也會覺得其它的姐妹都比我好多了。我會不斷地努力改善我在傳教所做的一切,但我還是會覺得我所付出的努力都不夠。我知道我不該在這個問題上太介意。我真的需要對天父為我預備的計劃有更多的信心。我不知祂已經為我預備了哪些事情,但我知道我得更加運用我對祂的信賴。我回來這邊之前,我在賓州的傳道部會長鼓勵我讀我的教長祝福而寫一個單子。這個單子包括一些「我是」,「我會」,和「我不會」的事情。我還沒寫完這個單子,但我覺得它已經幫助我更了解我的本性,它也使我知道我是我們慈愛的天父的女兒。我有時會懷疑祂是否真的愛我,或祂是否在看顧我。我需要記得我所面臨的考驗畢竟都是對我有好處的。它們都會讓我變得更堅強,尤其是我對福音的見證。

我們上週過了搬家大會,但對我來說,沒有任何的改變。我還是跟昊姐妹在一起,我們也沒有受到新的任務。可是一件令我興奮的事情就是,我以前的訓練著(成姐妹)和我在傳教士訓練中心的同伴(薛瑞特姐妹)現在是個同伴團!我沒想到這樣的情況會發生!並且,這個搬家期是成姐妹的最後一個。她要早一個搬家期返鄉,這樣她就可以辦簽證而去夏威夷的楊百翰大學來做完她的最後一個搬家期。我很驚訝我「媽媽」的傳教士見快要結束!光陰似箭!我的確不要再想到這個搬家期的結尾。我每次想到她很快就要回家,就會想到我若沒有她的話,怎麼能繼續好好地傳教!她一直在關心我,而且她很有靈性。她往往會跟我說到我需要聽到的話。我非常感激神所給我的每個優秀的同伴。你們看看我在賓州時的最後一個同伴(魏姐妹)上個星期給我寫的信。她真的知道我所需要聽到的!她所寫的信確實使我感到許多鼓勵。

「約瑟斯密遇到過非常多的反對,比妳所想的還多,但這些困難就讓他成為一個更好的人。它們也使他的見證變得更堅強。妳也是這樣子!我知道妳所面臨的考驗也會幫助妳成為一個更好的人!要記得,妳每次碰到一個反對者,就會有機會向主表達妳對祂的福音和贖罪的感謝。妳不該忍受這樣的艱難而已,妳也應該像先知一樣,也就是表現出耐心和愛心。應姐妹,妳確實是我認識的最堅強的人之一!因為神知道妳可以做得到,所以祂派妳到聖殿廣場。祂也知道不管妳遇到的反對者或困難,妳永遠都會對祂有信心,你的信心並不會動搖,而且妳永遠也會愛做祂的事工。祂會把最辛苦的考驗給祂最堅強的僕人。應姐妹,妳的確是祂英勇女兒其中的一位,祂知道妳所遇到的困難都是妳能忍得住的。」

她非常棒!我真的很幸運能跟她在一起五個月!我的時間到了!我想念也愛你們大家!

愛,
應姐妹

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